I used to feel a certain way on concert weekends. This set of feelings was specific to what day it was during the weekend of a Classical series at the Oregon Symphony.

Saturday: opening night. I’m a bit nervous all day and find it hard to not feel anxious. On Saturdays I definitely have to keep my nerves in check, so as to not act on the impulses they cause… irritability comes to mind, but there are others to be sure. Just ask my amazing husband.

Sunday: one performance under my belt. I’m less nervous and looking forward to having a more relaxed experience. Sundays are afternoon concerts and I have always loved a matinee. Don’t get me started about how much I love a free Sunday evening!

Then comes Monday: the last concert of the series. (Fun fact: most theaters in the US are dark or closed on Mondays. The OSO has traditionally played Monday evening concerts for decades, and despite its rarity in the field, draws some of our most dedicated audiences here in PDX.) Monday is ALWAYS accompanied by a feeling of accomplishment, joy, and relief. On my last day of work at the symphony pre-pandemic, weekends have taken on a totally different feeling.

We’ve had nearly three months of free weekends, with countless more on the other side of this. Working weekends has its definite upsides. I’d never trade being able to grocery shop on a Tuesday mid-morning! I think most everybody in the entertainment and service industry pre-COVID used to relish the rare weekend off. Now things have shifted for all of us in ways we could not even have imagined, with more of the unknown to come. To quote Lady Grantham of Downton Abbey, “what IS a weekEND?”

Since Friday March 13th (the irony is too much), weekends have come with a very different set of emotions. I have to fight feeling lost and aimless during these days, and I guess it makes sense because I’m supposed to be working. Don’t get me wrong, like most of us my brain has no idea what day it is. But my body clearly knows. These feelings are older than my 20-year-old job in the Oregon Symphony. Sure, it’s taken years to manage them, and I look forward to continuing to do that with a new post-pandemic perspective, new lessons only just beginning to take shape.

Even so, I cannot wait to feel nervous all day on a Saturday, to watch TV on a free Sunday night, and I cannot wait to hear our incredible dedicated Monday night audience cheer us on so we can start all over again!

Karen Wagner
Assistant Principal Oboe, Oregon Symphony